The holiday glow begins to fade and you’re left with the overwhelming feeling of a marriage you aren’t invested in. You may have stayed in the relationship for a mix of different reasons, maybe it was for your children so they were able to enjoy the holidays. The stress of the holidays may have gotten to you and filing for divorce just wasn’t something you wanted to expend the little energy you had left on.
Regardless of the reason, you’re not alone if you’re looking to get started with a new year and new life. According to courts, January is the month each year in which the most divorces are filed. January is known for being the resolution month, many people begin to make new beginnings and fresh starts.
It’s no surprise divorce rates skyrocket during this time. Let's take a look at some of the more common reasons that lead January to be considered the divorce month.
Staying Together for the Holidays
Couples who have a family together often times feel that it’s best to wait until the busyness and emotions attached with the holidays come to an end, before making the decision to divorce. Although divorce is never easy, many people feel that they may lessen the impact for all parties involved by waiting until the holidays are over.
However, there are some even bigger problems with waiting out the holidays. Often times when one partner is ready to divorce but chooses to stay in the relationship through the holidays, they put on a fake smile while counting the days. This may cause the other marital partner to feel like things are improving; making the January divorce feel like something out of the blue.
On the other hand, this time may be spent trying to salvage the marriage. During the holidays you can count on being able to spend more time with your loved ones than you normally would any other time of the year. Due to this, it's possible to rekindle the flame and set a plan moving forward that brings both partners happiness.
With the holidays being known as the most stressful time of the year, it’s no surprise that many people are brought to their breaking point following December. With the added holiday stress of keeping a family together, putting on a fake smile, containing emotions, and increased spending, many couples who are already struggling can’t bear the thought of another year of these feelings.
Having the New Year Planned
Many marital partners who decide to have a January divorce simply may have just planned it out this way. They may see themselves doing something vastly different with their life this upcoming year.
Some of the more common reasons people may want to divorce at the beginning of the year:
The new year brings in new opportunities.
Their New Year’s resolution may be to have a happier life, and leaving their marriage may be the first step.
Tax filing or other financial reasons. This is because usually even if you’re married for a single day of a new year, you will be able to file as a married couple and collect financial benefits by doing so.
With a new year comes new goals, new dreams, new motivation, and even times new love. New love before a divorce, as always, has pros and cons.
New love is often times fresh and makes you feel alive again. If you’ve felt as though the thought of divorce is sucking the life out of you, dating could be what helps you find that spark again.
It can help take your mind elsewhere, as well as keeping your head clear—allowing for you to make more precise decisions about your divorce and life moving forward.
If you’re feeling as though you have lost everyone in the process of a divorce, dating can help you feel less lonely.
If you feel as though your partner has lost their love for you, going out on dates with someone who enjoys your company may feel like a dream come true.
It may make settling the divorce peacefully impossible, as more emotions (jealousy, anger, sadness) fly things get uglier more often than not.
Having sexual relations with another individual while still married is called adultery. Committing adultery while thinking of getting a divorce causes nothing but problems. It can cause you to not receive spousal support as well as add a much more complex side to the divorce.
It may cause you to become blind to keeping your assets. You may be so excited to get your life started with the new lover that you are willing to just hand over your assets to your ex-partner—leaving you left out on the curb if your rebound relationship ends.
Talking to an Attorney About Your New Life
If you’re contemplating if divorce is the right decision, before you wait any longer, you should speak to an experienced Long Island family law & divorce attorney.
Finding the right attorney can have huge implications on the psychological and emotional impact of your divorce. At Wisselman, Harounian & Associates, we believe caring and compassionate representation is a key aspect of long-term emotional wellness for yourself and your family.
When we work with our clients, we do our best to ensure that they are always comfortable throughout their legal experience. We offer free consultations to all prospective clients to allow them to see what our practice has to offer and make the right steps towards their new life.
Does your new life begin with divorce? We’d love to talk to you about your case, call (516) 773-8300 now for a free consultation!